Fun List Fridays

We Present: Random Lists of Distinctly Selected Items. If you would like to contribute a list, please email us funlistfridays@gmail.com and include your list, list title, and post name in the body of the email. We do not discriminate or edit.

Wednesday, April 28, 2004

ITEMS OFF THE MENU OF 'CHINA CHEF', VOTED BEST CHINESE FOOD RESTAURANT 2003 BY LA JOLLA LIGHT READER, THAT COULD ALSO BE NAMES FOR SEX ACTS

Triple Delight
ChangSha Water Chestnuts
Tung Ting
Double Happiness
Cream Cheese Wonton
PoPo Platter
Rick's Broccoli
Moo Shu Pork
Kung-Po Three
2 in 1 Soup

Friday, April 16, 2004

INVERSELY PROPORTIONATE RELATIONSHIPS

Time since graduation of college vs. Tolerance of hippies
Time spent on Friendster vs. Productivity in the work place
Listening to the Smiths vs. Will to live
Reality Television shows vs. Faith in Humanity
Continuation of Colin Quinn's Television Career vs. Faith In God
Time elapsed since Twisted Sister was on the charts vs. Dee Snider's ability to rock


WHY THINGS DIDN'T WORK OUT BETWEEN MY GIRLFRIEND AND I, IN THE FORM OF TWO LISTS OF OUR INTERESTS
(Joe Barry)

HER INTERESTS
Holiday Cards
Sentimentality
Hugs

MY INTERESTS
Speedways
Forearms
Being Diabolical

Saturday, April 03, 2004

1986 NEW YORK METS WORLD CHAMPIONSHIP TEAM BREAKFAST CEREALS

Gary Carter's Honeycomb Afro Puffs--Finally Nabisco recreated the perfect color and consistency of cereal for this future Hall of Famer's crunchy curls. Best if eaten out of a earless Mets batting helmet.

Doc Gooden's Pitchers Mounds of Special K--Great pick-me-up of late night nourishment. Mounds of special k cut with a line of sugar resembling a pitchers rubber. The doctor knows best!

Lenny Dykstra's Chaw Soup--Shredded wheat with a slight tinge of honey summer blend flavoring. Let the milk make it soggy and stick a spoonful in yer cheek for an hour or so.

Strawberry's Sweet Swing Pops--Chocolate nostrils filled with sugar and strawberries make this early morning eye-opener a sweettooth favorite.

Hernandez Zucherritos(translated: little sugar things)--Orange and Blue died corn puffs shaped like little 17's. Some of the 7s look like noses and have little marshmallow moustaches.

Wally Backman and Rafael Santana's Fruity Pebbles--No question you loved watching these two turn two on the field, but now its 6-4-3 on the breakfast table as well. Towel snapping, crackle, pop was the lockerroom vibe as well for these two fruity pebbles. Grrr.

Mookie Crisps--Mini cookies. Mini chips. Mookie Crisps; not even Bill Buckner could handle that.

Thursday, April 01, 2004

ACTUAL LIES PERPETUATED (WITH A STRAIGHT FACE) BY THIS STONER GIRL NICOLE THAT I KNEW IN COLLEGE, BASED ON HOW FUCKED UP SHE WAS AT THE TIME. (list of 11 culled from an archive of hundreds)


1 beer: I'm a virgin
*shot of Jager: My aunt used to run a phone sex line
2 shots of Jager: I worked for her sometimes
2 beers: I'm not drunk, I swear.
1 SoCo and Lime: I hooked up with Scott Baio at a bar in Cancun during Spring Break
2 Bonghits: I've never done anal
*3 shots of Jager, 3 beers: This guy offered $500 to take topless pictures of me in his van when we were in New Orleans
1 Beerbong, puked, 1 Newport Light Menthol: My dad was a 'greaser' in The Outsiders but he got cut out of the final edit because he didn't get along with Matt Dillon.
4 beers: People tell me I look like Naomi Watts, but, like, with dreads.
4 Shots of Jager, pisses in bathtub, 2nd and 3rd Newport Light Menthol: People tell me I look like Naomi Watts, but, like, a brunette.
Dared to take a shot of Everclear, end of the night Newport Light Menthol: (while listening to Lou Reed's Take a Walk On the Wild Side) I sang background vocals on this. (Deadhorse's my passed out friend Campbell)

*Could be true