Fun List Fridays

We Present: Random Lists of Distinctly Selected Items. If you would like to contribute a list, please email us funlistfridays@gmail.com and include your list, list title, and post name in the body of the email. We do not discriminate or edit.

Thursday, July 17, 2008

THINGS I DO NOT WANT TO SEE AT THE BEACH (Source2, Danny Tanners Stand Up Act, Feenetti)

1. Hair Diaper spilling out of bikini bottoms. (EASE you silver back guerrilla)

2. Tally Wackers!

3. French Men

5. Elephant Boy

6. Weird Al

7. Outee belly buttons

8. People with medal detectors…grow UP…your not going to find any treasure you fucking goonie

9. people with banana hammocks

10. hairy armypits on woman

11. speedos

12. two piece bathing suits on men

13. two piece bathing suits on woman who need to be wearing one piece

14. an adult without kids making a sand castle by turning filled sand pals over

15. GO GO RONNIE getting banged doggystyle by DINO behind the snack bar

16. Naked little kids - listen parents we don't wanna see your little kid rolling around in the sand ass naked... Not cool

17. Nude men - its not a fuckin nude beach you fag

18. people playing badmitton...WTF? this is the worst game ever and why do people think the beach is the right place for this gay alternative to tennis? I mean instead of a ball they use something called a shuttlecock that looks like one of those little guys with the propellars you have to dodge and kill with something stronger than the wooden Sword in Zelda on Nintendo. EASE I am trying to marinade in oil and get my toast on

19. People playing with those stupid velcro padels with the tennis ball. Hey retards...havent you noticed that the ball doesnt stick because it is too heavy and when it gets wet there is no way the velcro will work? GEEEEEEZUS get out of here people...im in ultimate relax mode and i am tired of witnessing utter and blatant stupidity. the worst part is that you and your buddy are like 33 years old and in major adult no no territory. TAKE THE WHITE SEA SHELLS CHOKER NECKLACES off as well that you won each other at the arcade on the boardwalk...you both now have egg on your feet...BEAT IT

20. People setting up an exact replica of their fucking living room. WTF?...you are at the beach...get a towel, throw it on the sand, and fucking flop down on the bitch and toast...then when you get too hot, stand up and walk your fat ass into the ocean, and then return to the towel...you people get up off your quilted blanket after your feet were up on youre little coffee table and make an announcement to your family that you are going into the water as if you were leaving the house. HEY DICKFUCK!!! i dont care. what are you going to be late for dinner or something? You and your family dont live on this beach so pack up your brady bunch act and hit the road...you make me sick...by the way just because your three nut job kids built a moat around your "house" does not mean that high tide wont fuck your shit up...it will be Katrina all over for you...also i can easily sneak my way in to raid your fridge and take a doodie on your welcome mat...im done with this shit...peace

3 Comments:

  • At 1:21 PM, Anonymous BauerOut said…

    Yo maaaad funny

     
  • At 7:52 AM, Blogger BeeRmakesMePooP said…

    Pretty solid list...
    add ons:
    - bernie lomax
    - 4 wheelin cop with those stupid helmets (reminds me of the ridiculous mall cops that ride those stand up 2 wheel tard mobiles)
    - super-really tan guy, always wearing a banana hammock and always walks by you at least 5 times. This guy looks like he spent the last 20 years oiling up and getting ready for an "out-of-shape" bodybuilders contest

     
  • At 8:35 AM, Anonymous Kid Springsteen said…

    HaHa! Outee belly buttons creep me out. So do surgery scars. So do beer guts hanging over short shorts. So do shark attacks. So does asking me to rub sunscreen on your back when there are girls all over the beach that you could at least try asking first.

     

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