WORDS OF WISDOM I BEQUEATH ON THE YOUTH AS I TURN ANOTHER YEAR WISER
(By Gangsta)

-Puking for distance is not a sport

-Most women do not like it when you "make it rain on them hoes"

-Shopping carts can fight back

-Salvia will fuck you up

-Hangovers DO get worse as you get older

-Vegetarians don't live past 40

-Vegans don't live past 31 (unless you are being raised by vegans, then you die six months after birth like the kid whose parents were vegans and only fed him soy milk and apple juice. He died of starvation. That is a pretty painful death. Yea, FUCK vegans. Meat is Bueno)

-Fire Sauce from Taco Bell is really not that hot

-When eating Red Lobster's All You Can Eat Shrimp, if you get less that 8 refills, you are a pussy. Nut up and gorge yourself.

-Any time your bro needs you for a wing man but you stay home to watch (insert any shit-hole TV program here), cut off your balls, you no longer need them

-Armageddon it

-Michael Jackson used to be black