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Thursday, February 22, 2007

In response to the two new movies out, 'Wild Hogs' and 'Ghostrider', I want to start a new section for Funlist Fridays called....'Face/Off' honor of the stars of these two instant classics. (LHawk)

So here's how face off two actors and their careers and see who should hang'em up. I'll start with the inspiration Nicholas Cage and John Travolta, the stars of 'Ghostrider' and 'Wild Hogs'.

Early Years: Johnny started his career with a couple big movies like 'Saturday Night Fever' and 'Grease'; I know all you greasers out their love them, I know you had a travolta trapper-keeper when you were a kid Bauerout. Not a bad start T-man, I give you 2 points for them.

Cage on the otherhand was a late bloomer. He only had a couple of hits in the beginning like 'Valley Girl'
and 'Peggy Sue got Married'. If you haven't seen them...don't. I give him 1 point for the Johnny from Karate Kid look alike haircut in 'Valley Girl' and another for being Brad's Bud in 'Fast Times'. 2 points

Middle years: Cage kind of has a falling out after his strong start, but comes back hard in '92 with a all-star performance in 'Honeymoon in Vegas'. Nothing really stands until '96 when America decided that Nicholas Cage would be an action hero. 'The Rock'
really was his first and best action movie because he played the role of himself...a pussy. From then to now we are stuck with a wuss instead of Sly. You can't 'call in Cameron Poe' but you can sure as hell 'call in the Cobra'. I'll give you 1 point for 'Leaving Las Vegas' but I'm taken it away for that shitty accent in 'Con-Air'

Travolta might as well have called in sick during this period too. I wish I could have heard the pitch your manager told you about the 'Look Who's Talking'
script. Seriously though T-time, Bruce Willis saved both of them. I got to give you credit for 'Pulp Fiction' though only 1 point though cause you got shot because you were taken a dump. Maybe 2 if you would have upperdecked Willis first.

Face/Off '97- I haven't seen an action team-up like this since 'Nighthawks' with Sly and Billy-Dee Williams. What were the producers thinking when they made this? Let's get a guy 5'6" 140lbs to trade faces with a 6'4" 230lbs gorilla and people will believe it.
Personally, Van Damme could have turned that movie right around; look at 'Double Impact', the guy knows all about playing the duel role. Travolta gets 1 point for living. Cage gets nothing.

Post Face/Off: Now I don't know about any of you, but when I saw the 'Ghostrider' trailer I almost pissed myself. Then I saw the 'Wild Hogs'
trailer....speechless. If any of you Funlisters saw either of these movies, please leave, seriously and don't come back. I am all for checking out a movie at least once, I mean I watched 'Kittie and Stud', research purposes only, but these have to be the worst of their careers. Cage is not an action star what so ever. He should stick to the drama section of Blockbuster if you know what I mean. 0 points Travolta at least knows his acting days are numbered.
Look at the other actors in 'Wild Hogs', Tim Allen, that guy screams desperate for work. Martin Lawerence, 'Blacknight' was good really, didn't it go right to TBS? They might as well have called this movie 'Mid-life Crisis'. I almost forgot
'Battlefield: Earth', no comment, just minus one. -1 points

Overall score: Travolta 3, Cage 2. Nice job JT, you aren't a loser for a day.

Next Face/Off: Christian Slater vs Kevin Bacon, its gonna be a barn burner.


  • At 1:00 PM, Anonymous gangsta said…

    I guarantee you that sheriff saw Ghostrider on opening night. Ask him for a review.

  • At 6:41 AM, Anonymous Source2 said…

    totally i heard Sherrif and Kid Springsteen mandated hard on opening night.

  • At 9:28 AM, Blogger Beer Makes Me PooP said…

    This comment has been removed by the author.

  • At 9:30 AM, Blogger Beer Makes Me PooP said…

    yeah, i hear he has the poster on his wall and a little Cage doll with bike accessory...

  • At 1:59 PM, Anonymous Sheriff said…

    Fuck you Gangsta, you are completely right! Not opening night, but two days after. By the way, the movie sucked ass...

  • At 12:15 PM, Anonymous Bauerout said…

    And by "Sucked Ass" you mean you were totally digging N. Cage

  • At 10:55 AM, Anonymous Cheech said…

    so you are pretty much saying then that you went on a man-date two-days after the opening night, especially if you get so aggressive about it...


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