Fun List Fridays

We Present: Random Lists of Distinctly Selected Items. If you would like to contribute a list, please email us funlistfridays@gmail.com and include your list, list title, and post name in the body of the email. We do not discriminate or edit.

Friday, January 06, 2006

WHILE WE’RE ON THE SUBJECT OF NAMES…POSSIBLE NAMES FOR
MY DOGS (PS…IF I EVER MEET YOUR DOG AND IT HAS ONE OF
THESE NAMES AND I WILL PUNT YOUR BITCH) (By Mahnny being Mahnny. Formerly Brocktoon)

-Lunch Box (can also double as my kid’s name)

-Chauncey (for girl dog only)

-Bobby Salazar

-The Shitter

-Balls

-Nasty Nate

-Hoops McAnn

-Ringo

-Nacho Grande

-Dagmar

-Stabone (Tip o’ the hat to K. Cameron and Growing
Pains)

-Mr. Bojangles

-Lug Nut

-No Nuts (Thank you Bob Barker)

-Lil Dog

-Noriega



DON’T FUCK WITH THE BURGER KING!!! (By Mahnny Being Mahnny)


-Fuck T-O, The King already has as many touchdowns and
yardage (if not more), and on top of that, he keeps
his mouth shut! The King doesn’t need words,
sharpies, or stupid eagle flaps to let the world know
who’s boss. He’ll let you know with his maniacal
stare and stoic silence….not to mention he plays
offense and defense.

-Need a skyscraper built? Call The King! You’ll be
all trying to eat your lunch way up high on an I-bar,
and then: what’s that? Is there someone on the other
side of this beam? It’s The King bitch!!! He’s not
going to tell you how to do your job, he’s just gonna
pump you up with that wicked stare….that and a large
order of chicken fries.

-The King Vs. T. Guy Minetti. Now I know some of you
will be quick to jump in Minetti’s corner with your
spit bucket and over abundance of Q-tips, but just
hold your horses there. We’re talking about The King
here. I mean, he’s the fucking Burger King you got
that? They should actually change their name to
Fucking Burger King. Now I bet this would go twelve
rounds and end in a split decision, but when the
judges are sitting there trying to figure out how
Minetti lasted so long against such a dominating force
as The King is, and maybe they should give the V. to
T. Guy, they’ll feel the overwhelming heat coming
from His eyes and come to their senses and realize
that all titles from here on out will go to The King.
What’s The King’s record you ask? Infinity-0

-All lumberjacks love The King.

-The King went on Geraldo At Large for his first
interview since the advent of the chicken fries and in
response to Gerry’s first question: How does it feel
to be the king? He just sat there and smiled…for the
rest of the interview.

-Can you eat a Triple Whopper??? The King dares thee.


ADDITIONAL THINGS TO DO IN A HOTEL ROOM ON A HOCKEY
TRIP (by Mahnny Being Mahnny)


-Eat an 1/8 of mushrooms with your roommate and assure
your coach when he asks why you’re not celebrating the
big win with your teammates that you’re “just tired”
and yes, your pupils are always this big.

-Empty the entire contents of one rookie’s room onto
the balcony and snow covered lawn below

-RAMBONE: THE DESTROYER

-Practice your Chappy “Too Legit To Quit” dance in
front of mirror-tighty whities optional.

4 Comments:

  • At 10:25 AM, Anonymous Dalton Husk said…

    A little creativity with hockey tape, rubber bands and spandex can yield a glorious scrotal cameltoe. Mirror. Digi cam. Epic.

     
  • At 7:57 PM, Blogger Grady Cole said…

    What to do in a hotel room on a hockey trip? Simple- what I always do. Your mom.

     
  • At 8:35 PM, Anonymous Ease on Ebonics said…

    Totally- the king could rhythmically pleasure any woman. He's the king. It's good to be the king... and when the Viagra wears off, there will be a cornucopia of chicken fries to ease the pain.

     
  • At 12:19 PM, Anonymous Lock it up said…

    Stuff your brother into your hockey back with a handle of jack and smuggle him into your room. Then hook up Sega and the NHL94 you brought along with you and make your opponent take a shot every time you make Wayne's head bleed or score on a cheap wrap around deek.

     

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