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Monday, May 17, 2004

WAYS TO 'PUNK' ASHTON KUCHER

Poison his drink. After he drinks it tell him: "Don't worry man, I didn't just poison your drink." Wait to see if he cries or if he just thinks he's being punk'd.

Kidnap his parents. Tell him you shot them. Wait to see if he cries or if he just thinks he's being punk'd. If he doesn't cry then go ahead and shoot his parents.

Pay Bruce Willis to bust in on him and Demi Moore having sex and then beat the ever living shit out of Ashton Kusher until he either cries or thinks he's being punk'd.

Start a rumour that he and Puff Daddy are dating.

Demi Moore: I have genital warts
Ashton Kusher: No way dawg, you're punkin' me.
Demi Moore: Am I?
(Get Bruce Willis to confirm on Genital Warts)
(For additional Punk'd Evidence, get Patrick Swayze to confirm on Genital Warts from a brief hookup during the filming of GHOST)

Pay police to "pretend" to arrest him. Pay jury to "pretend" to convict him. Pay judge to "pretend" to sentence him. Pay prison guards to "pretend" not to watch as some guy named Bubba makes him his bitch for 5-10 years.


REALITY TV SHOWS I HAVE PITCHED TO MY FRIENDS AND THEY HAVE ASSURED ME WILL NEVER AIR ON ANY NETWORK. EVER.

Any of my Punk'd scenarios.
Who Wants To Marry A Guy With A Million Get Rich Quick Schemes
Junk'd--Shoot a junkie up with heroin. Send him to a first grade class for show and tell. Watch him freak out.
Iron Chef in 3rd World Country--Same scenario as normal Iron Chef: chefs make a series of dishes all containing a special ingredient, except this time Chefs have to use swords to fight off famished kids who attempt to steal ingredients.
Nuns Gone Wild
Pimp My Braces--Yo its the blingbling millenium, baby, pimp those shits out. Xzibit finds someone with some fucked up British-ass teeth and pimps out a fresh set of braces for 'em. Hydraulics, gold caps, Spreewheels, an X-Box, whatever. Live large biatch!
Ghetto Survivor--Drop some skinny white suburban hippies off in the Chicago ghettos. One team wears flourescent pink jumpsuits, the other wears flourescent green jumpsuits. The object is to steal as many blood or crip bandanas as you can without, you know, getting shot. Instead of getting voted off the island, you get shot. Last man standing wins an autographed Tony Danza softball jersey.

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