THINGS I REALIZED WHILE WATCHING "THE EAGLES FAREWELL TOUR" ON BRAVO (By Brocktoon)
-Nice to see Joe Walsh showed up in his PJ's
-Could the audience be any whiter? Clap on 1&3
people, now you're getting it!
-Oh man, i can't wait for the new season of blow out!
-Wow, i didn't know death could play bass.
-You know what? Overall this has been a pretty upbeat
show...what's that, they're encoring with desperado?
great, now let's go home and cry like a bunch of
pussies.
-I wish i was the guy who invented the helmet cam, let
alone the guy who rigged Joe Walsh's sweet ass
hard-hat-cam.
-Fuck Walden!

THINGS GIRLS SAY THAT ACTUALLY MAKE ME NOT WANT TO SLEEP WITH THEM (BUT REALLY, WHO AM I KIDDING, I'D STILL DO THEM) (By Brocktoon)
-"I get pregnant easily...with or without the condom."
Ok, i can accept the fact that some are more fertile
than others...but with or without rubbers? What the
fuck does that mean?
-"My kid is going to love you!" Yeah, that'd be hot
if your kid was 18.
-"I love to give hand-jobs"
-"I love you."
-"You gonna eat that?"
-"No, i won't let you put that plunger there."
-"I love the taste of condoms"
-"Don't you think Beaches is a great movie?"
-"I feel like having a good cry...wanna cry with me?"

THINGS/PEOPLE THAT NEED TO "EASE" (By Brocktoon)
-Stephen Baldwin
-Bobby Brown
-Vincent Shelley's Lips
-People with babies
-People who make lists about things that need to ease
before source2
-NASCAR
-John Fogerty
-Hemmoroids
-The String Cheese Incident
-"Diamond" David Lee Roth
-Sammy Hagar
-Board Shorts
-Guys with tattoos on their lower backs
-George Thorougood
-curtain calls in baseball: ok giambi, we don't need
you to doff your little cap just cause you hit a few
dingers while not on the roids.
-guys who rap out loud in public: ok, none of us here
are producers, nor do we know any who could do
anything with your "mad skillz"