1. Jason Giambi gets busted in the first inning with a corked bat. He reacts to his showcased guilt with a mysterious nosebleed.
2. Jason's brother Jeremey Giambi gets busted with 2 pounds of pure uncut cocaine in the womens public bathroom. Witnesses said he was actually dressed like a woman with make up and everything and a dress. He was then trying to pose as a lesbian and flirt rather agressively.
3. It seems that players eventually join the Yankees just to have a reason to grow the best mustaches of their careers.
4. The camera zoomed in on Curt Shillings crotch only to reveal a large and rather obvious red blood stain and a camela toe. Weird.
5. Jason Veritek got a small section of his catchers chest protector removed to showoff his gay captains "C" . We are all aware that every once and a while a team names a captain, but we also know that it is gay to actually wear the "C" on your jersey. This is not Pee-wee hockey, it is baseball. A move this gay actually has not been seen in in MLB history since Mets super-loser pitcher John Franco circa de mustache. Obviously Jason Veritak did not purchase Nature Boy Rick Flairs new novel titled, "How to be the Man"
6. Play all of a sudden stops in the fourth inning during the Red Sox at bat when cameras capture Johnny Damon and Mark Belhourn getting into a slap fight over a scrungee. No one was hurt in the incident but Kevin Millar was seen in the background jerking off. He is up for review with the MLB board on Thursday, the 7th. Poor kids.
7. Fun List Friday's writer LHawk parachutes to the field during the seventh inning stretch and shreds an electric airguitar solo from "We're not gonna take it" by Twisted Sister. FLF's highly advanced and often illegal Research and Development team informed us that Dee Snider was caught jerking off to this scene at his Los Angles home.